Me+ Poverty + Unable to go out on Saturday night + Bored as hell =
Thursday, September 10, 2009
My First Youtube Video Remix
Idiot + FOX News =
Me+ Poverty + Unable to go out on Saturday night + Bored as hell =
Me+ Poverty + Unable to go out on Saturday night + Bored as hell =
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
Masterful Czech Graffiti #6: Slovenian Dicks Edition
The title says it all. Hanging out in Ljubljana, Slovenia in June was an outstanding and unique experience. My only knowledge prior to going to Ljubljana was that it was just a funny name in the window of the Eastern European travel agency next to Bon's all-day breakfast spot in Vancouver. But it's actually a fucking amazing city. The city rents out cruiser bikes for 5 Euros a day. It's flat and very green. Beers run about 2 Euros. There's an exciting and vibrant free living commune with bars and clubs in a three-block compound which was formerly a Yugoslav military base. The women are beautiful and they all speak English. But the icing on the cake for me, though, was the inexplicable dick graffiti literally plastered all over this town. Without further ado, some highlights of the many dicks of Ljubljana:
Romance!
Happiness!
True love!
Self-portrait!
Happiness!True love!Self-portrait!...and finally the piece de resistance, a daring three-dick Baile Funk masterpiece (with my rental bike in the foreground)!
I've been moving around a lot recently. More to come.
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Masterful Czech Graffiti: #5
I could lie and say I haven't had time to update this blog, but I've basically been spending my time in the past few months going on aimless yet epic walks, sitting on my ass trying to watch Two and a Half Men and Touched By an Angel in Czech, and playing a SHITLOAD of Earthbound for SNES. I have no regrets.
I guess the good news is that during these epic wandering treks I've seen a lot of stupid shit recently and I've been pretty good about bringing my camera around with me. So without further ado:
Plunder!
Reverberation!
Redundancy!
ESL!
Gangland!
Personal Favourite!
Uttering threats!
Rawk!
Size!
Emo!
Indiscriminate rage!
Dripping cock!
Unpleasant wishes!
Gangland!
Brutal honesty!
Personal Favourite!
Uttering threats!
Rawk!
Size!
Malaise!
Emo!
Indiscriminate rage!
Dripping cock!
Unpleasant wishes!
More soon!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
FUUUUCK
I apologize for turning this 'blog of questionable repute' into a 'blog of much neglect'. How's about a ma'fuckin update, clown?
How about some of THESE?
Well... How's THIS for lazy blogging? BAM!
What about THIS?
How about some of THESE?
This blog has little focus and even less direction. It gets better, I promise.
I also have about six thousand new graffiti photos, which I will upload as soon as my primitive Czech village gets electricity.
Monday, February 2, 2009
NWSFLSH: Local Man's Hopes Dashed by Shit African Economy
by Jeffy Jefferson, Staff Reporter
HARARE, Zimbabwe -- The dream is over. It's all gone Pete Tong. Well, there's good news and bad news. The good news is that The Central Bank of Zimbabwe has essentially abandoned its currency with the announcement that businesses can now legally conduct business in foreign currencies. This means a couple of things: among them, 1) that the starving trillionaires of Zimbabwe will continue to use US dollars for basic transactions, as they have been for months; 2) that Zimbabwean teachers, many of whom have resorted to selling their bodies on the street to earn money, might have some reason to go back to work in the coming months with the incentive of being paid in non-imaginary currency; and 3) that it no longer makes logical sense to continue printing new, obscenely high denominations of money nobody is using anyways.
So on to the really bad news, the related but much more distressing story for me: today we have news that a week or two after introducing its highest denomination bill ($100 trillion) they've knocked TWELVE more zeros off the Zim Dollar. If you've read this blog before, you know how devastating this is for me and my dream of rolling and writhing around in a bathtub teeming with cash money dollar bills, be they worthless or not. There's nothing I can do, and as a result it's probably time I start looking to other countries with floundering economies. Mother shit.
A short calculation: Under the new system, one trillion ZWD now equals one ZWD. In the last five months, this country has knocked TWENTY TWO zeros off its currency. At $100 trillion, the newest bill was worth about $35USD. If the system were left unchecked... Okay that's a poor choice of words, because the system HAS been left entirely unchecked. But if the system had not made its ludicrous attempts to control inflation by cutting 22 zeros out of the equation, $0.33 USD would today be worth ten SEXTILLION ZWD, or $10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 (there are something like 70 sextillion stars in our motherfucking GALAXY according to the most recent estimates). All that works out to about three and a half metric shit-tons of zeros. This kind of hyperinflation makes me finally understand why we had to learn scientific notation in high school, as when you get to numbers like these it's not even worth your time to write that many zeros. You know your country is in trouble when.
Anyways, in moderately positive news for the nation, it also looks like president Bobby "Dick" Mugabe may have finally come to a power-sharing deal with Morgan Tsvangirai, the HUGE-balled opposition leader who has in the past been kidnapped, threatened, and beaten to a pulp by Mugabe's troops. So maybe something good will come of that, but I wouldn't bet the farm just yet, as Mugabe has a promise-keeping history on par with Hitler himself ("Guys I told you already, I'm not gonna invade Czechoslovakia. Seriously. You have my word."). Because it's topical, and because Mugabe's a dick, I want to share this awesome drawing my brother Justin did of Mugabe recently:
'mr. mugabe, how do you get your powers?' (2009)
HARARE, Zimbabwe -- The dream is over. It's all gone Pete Tong. Well, there's good news and bad news. The good news is that The Central Bank of Zimbabwe has essentially abandoned its currency with the announcement that businesses can now legally conduct business in foreign currencies. This means a couple of things: among them, 1) that the starving trillionaires of Zimbabwe will continue to use US dollars for basic transactions, as they have been for months; 2) that Zimbabwean teachers, many of whom have resorted to selling their bodies on the street to earn money, might have some reason to go back to work in the coming months with the incentive of being paid in non-imaginary currency; and 3) that it no longer makes logical sense to continue printing new, obscenely high denominations of money nobody is using anyways.
So on to the really bad news, the related but much more distressing story for me: today we have news that a week or two after introducing its highest denomination bill ($100 trillion) they've knocked TWELVE more zeros off the Zim Dollar. If you've read this blog before, you know how devastating this is for me and my dream of rolling and writhing around in a bathtub teeming with cash money dollar bills, be they worthless or not. There's nothing I can do, and as a result it's probably time I start looking to other countries with floundering economies. Mother shit.A short calculation: Under the new system, one trillion ZWD now equals one ZWD. In the last five months, this country has knocked TWENTY TWO zeros off its currency. At $100 trillion, the newest bill was worth about $35USD. If the system were left unchecked... Okay that's a poor choice of words, because the system HAS been left entirely unchecked. But if the system had not made its ludicrous attempts to control inflation by cutting 22 zeros out of the equation, $0.33 USD would today be worth ten SEXTILLION ZWD, or $10,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 (there are something like 70 sextillion stars in our motherfucking GALAXY according to the most recent estimates). All that works out to about three and a half metric shit-tons of zeros. This kind of hyperinflation makes me finally understand why we had to learn scientific notation in high school, as when you get to numbers like these it's not even worth your time to write that many zeros. You know your country is in trouble when.
Anyways, in moderately positive news for the nation, it also looks like president Bobby "Dick" Mugabe may have finally come to a power-sharing deal with Morgan Tsvangirai, the HUGE-balled opposition leader who has in the past been kidnapped, threatened, and beaten to a pulp by Mugabe's troops. So maybe something good will come of that, but I wouldn't bet the farm just yet, as Mugabe has a promise-keeping history on par with Hitler himself ("Guys I told you already, I'm not gonna invade Czechoslovakia. Seriously. You have my word."). Because it's topical, and because Mugabe's a dick, I want to share this awesome drawing my brother Justin did of Mugabe recently:
'mr. mugabe, how do you get your powers?' (2009)Awesome.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
When Advertising Goes Oh So Right
You may have seen this, and I usually refrain from posting videos, because there are so many of them and they are not really the focus of this blog, but this is the best thing I have seen in a long time. It is taken from a recent broadcast of Battlestar Galactica on the Space network, where apparently Jesus Christ Himself is working overtime as the Hilarious Advertising Placement Manager. Make sure you watch it to the end. Alls I will say is, ka-blammo.
Alleluia!
Thursday, January 15, 2009
Masterful Czech Graffiti: #4
To make up for the serious lack of graffiti photos over the past two months, I will now unleash a warm torrent of photo action all over your sultry, volunteering eyes. Here we goes, starting with the most astounding piece I've seen yet:
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